I Want the Isaac Not the Ishmael

Some days my heart is just so full and I have so much to share. And because I often process things out in my life by talking or writing, you guys get to be a part of that.
 
I'm single. There, I said it. For some of you that will come as a shock but it's true. You may have seen the cute Facebook posts of myself and my boyfriend (at the time) and we were quite cute together. We had a lot in common and fell in love quickly. So, quickly, in fact, that we were planning our wedding and our life together. And from the outside, it appeared to be a God thing on every account. Even for me, on the inside, it felt like a God thing. It felt like the desires of my heart were finally being fulfilled, to be someone's wife and helpmate. However, I am now single. I'll tell you more about that in a little bit.
 
In the book of Genesis (Chapters 15-17), we read about Abram and Sara, a couple who desperately wanted a child. Instead of waiting for the Lord to bring about His promise to Abram of becoming the father of many nations, Sara got tired of waiting and decided to make some things happen. She gave her slave, Hagar, to Abram to sleep with in the hopes that she would conceive and ultimately fulfill Sara's dream of becoming a mother and the promise made to Abram. Hagar did conceive and bore a son named Ishmael. And while Ishmael was a blessing from God to Hagar, he was not the way that God wanted to fulfill his promise to Abram. Eventually, Sara conceived and bore a son named Isaac, who was indeed the fulfillment of God's promise.

Now, I'm not going to expound on that a whole lot because I think you get the idea and you can read the account for your self.

Back to my story. While, I don't actually think I made the relationship happen between me and my now ex, I can very much relate to the above story. Like I said before, if you were an onlooker, it looked like the perfect match. We both loved Jesus. We had the same views on major life issues (abortion, marriage, child rearing, etc.) His son loved us both together and really liked me.

However, there were 2 major beliefs that he held that I did not agree with. And while I could have just overlooked them, they were MAJOR spiritual belief issues for me (you don't really need to know what they were).

One Sunday morning at church, I began wrestling with the Lord about those issues. I tried to convince myself that the issues weren't as major as I was making them out to be. But I couldn't get away from the fact that they were non-negotiable issues for me and to ignore them would ultimately be to deny major parts of who I am as a believer. After much prayer and wrestling, I knew I had to end the relationship.

This relationship, I believe was my Ishmael. It looked like God, it felt like God, but it was not God's best for me. It taught me a lot about myself, it taught me even more about God's protection and grace.

All of that to say, I want the Isaac not the Ishmael. And my prayer is that you do to. Don't try to make something happen and don't fight for something that God wants you to lay down. He will honor you and bless you for your obedience and your willingness to wait for the promise to be fulfilled.

Choose Wisely

Over the last few days, the power of choice has been on my mind and heart. Particularly in the realm of my attitude. Yesterday, I came across this quote:

 

"I believe the single most significant decision I can make on a day to day basis is my choice of attitude. It is more important that my past, my education, my bankroll, my successes or failures, fame or pain, what other people think of me or say about me, my circumstances, or my position.

 

Attitude keeps me going or cripples my progress. It alone fuels my fire or assaults my hope. When my attitudes are right, there is no barrier too high, no valley to deep, no dream to extreme, no challenge too great for me."-Charles R. Swindoll

 

 

I have had some very challenging experiences here lately which have impacted me greatly. My immediate reaction, sadly, is a fleshly one, to become frustrated or upset over the circumstances. However, here lately, I am learning the power of quickly switching to a godly reaction instead. I mean, it would be fabulous if the godly reaction was my first reaction but I am still very much a work in progress. So, how does this work? Well, it's all about choosing wisely.

 

Philippians 4:8 tells us this, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things. 

 

2 Corinthians 10:5 says to, "Take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ."

 

These 2 verses tell me that I have a choice in my attitude. I can focus on my circumstances and become frustrated by them or I can focus on the Creator and His character.

 

Last Friday, I had a super frustrating day. It was literally, one issue after another. (I'll spare you the details- but just know I was in tears.) I wanted to have a pity party and be Negative Natalie. But I knew that wouldn't do me a lick of good. So, instead I began to encourage myself in the Lord. This is what that looked like:

 

God is faithful and He is love. He is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. He is the Creator, the transformer, the reconciler and the redeemer. He makes all thing...s new. He redeems my life from the pit and crowns me with love and compassion. Weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning. He is my shield and my rampart, my glory and the lifter of my head. He goes before me and makes every crooked place straight. He satisfies my desires with good things. When I am tired or weary, I will mount up with wings like an eagle. I am the apple of his eye. He is attentive to my cries. His ways are perfect and his love casts out all fear. He is my rock and my refuge, my help in the day of trouble. He is my strong tower and fortress. He sets a table before me in the presence of my enemies. His perfect love casts out all my fears. In him, I am safe, secure, blessed, favored, redeemed, healed, loved, forgiven, chosen, beloved, beautiful, and accepted!!

The shift in my focus caused a shift in my attitude. But the choice of choosing to shift my focus was mine. And it's yours. While I would love for this to be my response all of the time, I am still working on it. Hopefully, together though, we can choose wisely!