Daddy's Got Me!

Another level means more healing. More healing means more lies coming to the surface to be dealt with. A hard road to travel some days. I am perpetually reminded though, as each lie is revealed to me, about the prayer I prayed last summer. From the depths of my soul came a very dangerous prayer. I simply prayed for the Lord to debunk (tear down or show something to be false) every lie that I have ever believed about myself and about Him. He has been faithful and gracious enough to answer that prayer ever since the words came from my heart and lips.

This week has been a rather rough one, in the spiritual sense, as God continues to expose more lies and walk me through places of my heart that still need His healing touch. Yesterday and the day before were particularly painful days. During my quiet time with the Lord yesterday, I came upon this Scripture in The Message paraphrase that so captured my state at the time.

I'm caught in a maze and can't find my way out, blinded by tears of pain and frustration. I call to you God, all day I call. I wring my hands, I plead for help.~Ps 88:9 The Message

 

As always, God hears my pleas for help and allowed me to meet with my prayer partner, my friend that lays out the truth and encourages my heart and spirit. While I cried through most of my time with her, I walked away with some revelations. One of those revelations was that while I was in a seemingly familiar place, I was and am NEW in that place. The feelings of the present don't undermine all of the healing that God has done in my life to this point. The victories of the Lord can never be negated! And then she reminded me that even in the midst of this season, I have had victories. I have not reverted back to old ways or patterns and THAT IS HUGE!

 

As my day continued, I received an email from a friend that included a sound clip from Finding Nemo the "find a happy place" line. As I smiled, I continued to click on the other sound clips from the movie and I came across another line that God used to speak volumes to me! The line was:

 

"It's OK, daddy's here. Daddy's got you!"

 

WOW! WOW! WOW! It was my Heavenly Papa was speaking in that moment directly to my heart!

HE'S GOT ME! He's got you! I am still in the season, still in the rough part of the journey, BUT He said it's OK, He's here and He's got me!

 

Here's the sound clip link if you want to hear it for yourself!

http://www.hark.com/clips/qyqcwqscgm-daddys-here

Oh where, oh where has my big God gone?

I haven't really written much lately because I have been "trying to figure some things out!" Well, we all know how that goes! I get so consumed in fixing the "issue" that I lose sight of the bigger Issue. But before I go into that, let me sing my little diddy about how I have felt in this season, well really the last 2 weeks.

"Oh where, oh where has my big God gone? Oh where, oh where can He be?"

Since about January of this year, I have been in a different season, one that I have not been too particularly fond of. My "issue" for the past 3 months has been the "quietness" of God or the seeming "lack of His presence." I started out great in the season (don't we always!). God had kind of given me a little warning, indicating that on Discovery Birmingham, He would be guiding me by His voice only, which He very much did. Then He perpetually reminded me to "Walk by faith, not by sight!" Again, I was good with that reminder and even reminded myself frequently. But then the day came, about 2 weeks ago, when I realized I was frustrated. I wanted the Lord's presence more than anything. I was at the altar in church, crying out for just a second of His presence. I felt like the psalmist is Psalm 84:10 which said, "Better is one day in your courts than a thousand anywhere else." You and I both know that there is nothing like the presence of the Lord!

That same morning at the altar, the Lord spoke (again, He had been speaking but not as much as I like!). He said the words, "I am not giving you the silent treatment." At that, I broke. I was reminded of my earthly father who when he was upset or angry with me, he would give me the silent treatment and withhold his love from me. Despite all of the lies that God has had me deal with, there are still plenty that revolve around how I see Him in light of my earthly father. Additionally, there are many truths in Scripture that have not become revelation for me either.

You see, God says that, "he will never leave me nor forsake me". (Heb 13:5) But when I don't "FEEL" Him, I think He has left the building because of something I have done or because He is tired of dealing with me. Then I "FEEL" abandoned and rejected and then I am prone to turn to other people or things to find love and acceptance. In processing through all of this, I have come to a "conclusion about the Lord". I believe He has a cloaking device that He is able to utilize that makes it seem like He has left only to see how we will respond. Because the reality is that He can't leave me or forsake me. He is omnipotent and omnipresent. He is everywhere at all times so He is unable to leave me!

He is bringing revelation to all of the above, slowly but surely. I definitely don't have it all figured out BUT I am finding more grace in the waiting and more maturity in listening to the whispers of His voice. So, it's not so much an issue of a God who is seemingly MIA but rather a really intense and great game of hide and seek. He's "hiding" and I am seeking! The great news is that He promised that if I seek Him, I will find Him (Jeremiah 29:13)!

Pretty soon, I'll have a different diddy to sing and my guess is it will sound like this, "I've found a love greater than life itself!" :)

God Tested. God Approved.

Abraham Tested. Yep, that's the name of Genesis Chapter 22 in my Bible. In reading this story, I think we often gloss over the details and just come up with catchy sermon titles. So, I want to go through this story verse by verse and imagine those things that we aren't really given details about.

Gen 22:1-Some time later, God tested Abraham. He said to him, "Abraham!" "Here I am," he replied.

God tested Abraham. Just like you, I am not really fond of tests. But the reality is that we are given tests to see what we have learned and to judge our progress. In school, you generally only get to take the test once because they are concerned about your performance but I am so thankful that God is more concerned about our personhood then our performance! His tests are tests of character which allow us to see where we are (he already knows!) and what areas of weakness God still needs to refine.

Also in this verse, I love that there is absolutely no hesitation indicated in scripture here in Abraham's response. Abraham heard God's voice and he answered. May I be as quick to respond to the Lord as Abraham.

Gen 2:2-Then God said, "Take your son, your only son, Isaac, whom you love, and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about.

I find it interesting how specific God is when talking to Abraham about Isaac. You would think that all God would have to say is "Take your son" and Abraham would know which one God was talking about since he only had one. But God continues, "Take your son, your only son". "Your only son". Again, this seems kind of redundant but we know God has a purpose with every word he speaks. And then God names the son, "Isaac". At this point, I think Abraham gets who God is talking about. But then God seems to seal the matter further, "whom you love". Isaac was the fulfillment of the promise that God had made with Abraham. Isaac was a representation of the Lord's grace and love for both Abraham and Sarah! Besides that, Isaac is Abraham's son, so of course he loves him! Just as God finishes reminding Abraham of who Isaac is God seemingly asks the unthinkable. God asks Abraham to sacrifice Isaac as a burnt offering. God asks for Isaac back.

Gen 22:3-Early the next morning, Abraham got up and saddled his donkey. He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac. When he had cut enough wood for the burnt offering, he set out for the place God told him about.

Early the next morning is often likened to Abraham's swift act of obedience. And while, I agree, I also have to wonder what the night was like for Abraham. Can you imagine getting the news that you have to sacrifice your "promise" and then try sleeping after that? Scripture doesn't say that Abraham informed Sarah about what the Lord said and so it was just him mulling over the order from the Lord. I personally don't think Abraham slept much that night which made it a little easier for him to be up "early the next morning" but in that moment even though he was awake, Abraham still had a choice to make. Obedience or Disobedience? We see Abraham gather supplies, servants and his son.

Gen 22:4-On the third day, Abraham looked up and saw the place in the distance.

Okay, so I had never seen this before until this past week. Note that verse 4 says, ON THE THIRD DAY! I guess I had always over read that part and just assumed that this whole Abraham "sacrificing" the promise all happened on the same day! But it did not! Can you imagine traveling for 3 days knowing what lies ahead?!  That would have left plenty of opportunity for Abraham to turn around, to turn back and say, "God, I know what you are asking me but that is just too hard! You already know how much I love this boy! I thank you for giving him to me but I can't give him back to you!" And while Abraham may have been battling these thoughts, we see that he kept on going, kept on walking, kept on obeying God.

Gen 22:5-He said to his servants, "Stay here with the donkey while I an the boy go over there. We will worship and the we will come back to you."

So, I never caught this in verse 5 either..."WE, will come back to you." Did Abraham have that much faith that God wasn't going to really take his son with his proclamation that WE will come back? Was he just saying that so no one would know what would really happen up the mountain? I think it may have been that he was hoping that they both would be returning from the mountain.

Gen 22:6-8-Abraham took the wood for the burnt offering and placed it on his son Isaac, and he himself carried the fire and the knife. As the two of them went on together, Isaac spoke up and said to his father Abraham, "Father?" "Yes, my son?" Abraham replied. "The fire and wood are here," Isaac said, "but where is the lamb for the burnt offering?" Abraham answered, "God himself will provide the lamb for the burnt offering, my son." And the two of them went on together.

Okay, I put all of those verses so we can get the full picture. This is the only time we hear from Isaac in the whole chapter. While it was probably fairly normal for him to accompany his father for offering time, this time he notices that something very important is missing, the lamb. Now, I have to wonder what was happening with Abraham. Did he have tears streaming down his face as his son asked this question? Was he even able to look at Isaac as he asked his PaPa the question? Did Abraham and Isaac talk about other things as they traveled along for 3 days as I am sure that they had to? And what was going through Isaac's mind? Maybe he noticed dad was being more quiet than usual. Maybe he thought it was super odd for them to be going to sacrifice without an animal in tow. (All of these are just speculations on my part to try and get in the story with Abraham and Isaac. I think I have so often read this story knowing the outcome that I overlook the details or the feelings laden therein.)

Gen 22:9-When they reached the place God had told him about, Abraham built an altar there and arranged the wood on it. He bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar on top of the wood.

He bound his son Isaac and laid him on the altar. This is an incredibly hard scene for me to wrap my head around. Isaac, who knows the love of his PaPa, who probably knows that he is the promise of God to Abraham, is bound. The crazy thing is that Abraham had to do the binding! Was Isaac screaming? Was he crying? Was he trying to talk to Abraham and find out what was happening? Was Abraham crying? Was he praying? Did Abraham explain to Isaac what God had asked of him? How was Abraham handling this act of complete and total obedience? We don't know. How was Isaac handling being bound by the man that loved him (Abraham) so that he (Abraham) could be obedient to the God that loved him?

Gen 22:10 Then he reached out his hand and took the knife to slay his son.

Abraham was all in. Obedience in action.

Gen 22:11-12-But the angel of the Lord called out to him from heaven, "Abraham! Abraham!" "Here I am," he replied. "Do not lay a hand on the boy, " he said. "Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son."

Praise the Lord for the angel! Praise the Lord for Abraham hearing the Lord's voice!

NOW I know that you fear God! Abraham was willing to give back to the Lord what was already His and in turn blessings followed his obedience. A ram appears in the thicket for Abraham to sacrifice to the Lord. And then the Lord seals and ups his promise saying in verses 16-18, "I swear by myself declares the Lord that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, and through your offspring all nations on earth will be blessed because you have obeyed me."

Now, it's not likely that the Lord will ask us to head to the mountain for a sacrifice of this kind but what area of obedience does he want from us today? What area of obedience do you want from me today? Lord, I want it to be said of me like you said of Abraham, "Now I know that you fear God!"

Promises, promises!

This morning I began my face time with the Lord reading in 2 Corinthians 1 when I came across vs 20 which says:

For no matter how many promises God has made, they are "Yes" in Christ!

We often hear that all of God's promises are Yes and Amen and while we may be quick to shout an Amen to that, do we really believe it? God has promised me some things and He has promised you some things. But often, we lose sight of the promise and we forget to remind God of His promise. Of course, He's not like man and easily forgets His promises. He knows each and everyone of them but I think as we remind Him of the promises He's made to us, we, in turn, remind ourselves of what He's promised and our hope is revived!

From reading in 2 Corinthians, I returned to my study in Genesis and wound up in Genesis 18:14. When I read it I had to stop in my tracks.
Let me give you the scene and context of this verse. Abraham is chillin outside his tent and he ends up with some visitors on his tent step (I had some of those visitors this morning but mine were Jehovah's Witnesses!) :) Anyway, the visitors are messengers from the Lord and are basically bringing the good news that Sarah is about to become prego. Sarah is ancient by this time and finds it quite hilarious that God would bring life back to her seemingly dead womb and she LOL (well, to herself the Bible says). The Lord basically proceeds to put Sarah in her place and asks her this question:

"Is anything too hard for the Lord?" Genesis 18:14

WOW! How often have I lived like a situation, a problem, a circumstance was too hard for the Lord?! Lord, forgive me! You are bigger than my situations and NOTHING is too difficult for you!

What about you? Do you really believe that nothing is too hard for the Lord? What we believe will come out in our behaviors. If we believe that God has "it" under control, then we will be at peace. If we believe that God loves us and has our best in mind, we won't try to force things or make something happen in and of ourselves.

Fast forward to chapter 21:1:
"Now THE LORD WAS GRACIOUS to Sarah as he had said, AND THE LORD DID for Sarah WHAT HE HAD PROMISED."

THE LORD WAS GRACIOUS! He is so full of grace! The reality is that we don't deserve any of the blessings that the promises He makes hold but because of His grace and because of His faithfulness He does what He promises. He is not a man that He should lie! He doesn't tell us things to shut us up or to appease us. He doesn't make a promise that He doesn't intend to keep!

AND THE LORD DID! Only God can fulfill His promises. We often try to help Him out but He doesn't need or want our help. Nothing is too hard for Him but we act like "it" is. When we try to help God out, Ishmael's happen and Hagar troubles abound(see Genesis 16).

WHAT HE HAD PROMISED!  What are the promises He has spoken to you? Have you forgotten about them? Have you grown weary in waiting for them to be manifested in your life? If so, I challenge you to remind God of what He has spoken to you. Remind Him of His Word which is the compilation of His promises to His people. In reminding Him, we remind ourselves and our hope is stirred and restored. We can also look back at our life and remind ourselves of all of the times that His promises came to pass!

God is the same yesterday, today and forever! He is the best Promise Keeper that ever lived! Thank you God for all of the promises you have spoken to me about my future! Thank you for the promises that are already manifested in my life! Thank you for your graciousness and your faithfulness to me and my friends! Yes! And Amen! :)

Catch the Foxes!

Tuesday's, here lately, seem to be blog day for me, as I process out the nuggets from our Made to Crave Bible study. As I watched and listened to the video last night, a Scripture came to mind and it wasn't one Lysa was sharing. This morning, as I have looked up that Scripture, God showed me another one in the same book and I think they are very much related. 

The Scripture that came to me during the study was Song of Songs (Solomon) 2:15:

Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom.

As I looked at that Scripture this morning, God directed my attention to Song of Songs 1:6:

Do not stare at me because I am dark, because I am darkened by the sun. My mother’s sons were angry with me and made me take care of the vineyards; my own vineyard I have neglected.

I think there is much to chew on from these two verses but here's what revelation I have received so far. In Chapter 1, The Shuunamite woman gives her excuses as to why she is "dark" and I think the kicker is in the last part of the verse where she says, "my own vineyard I have neglected."

WOW! How true is that of most women?! We focus on others, in part because that is how we are wired but the other reality is that we don't want to deal with our own stuff. So in that taking care of others, we neglect our own vineyards! Notice, she blamed her current condition, of a neglected vineyard, on others, specifically, her brothers. We can blame our condition on everyone else but until we take ownership of the fact that we have sinned and neglected our own vineyards, we will live in the realm of misplaced blame and hide behind excuses. The Lord commands us to "love our neighbor's as ourselves" but if we neglect ourselves are we really even loving?

Fast forward to Chapter 2, where we read the Lover talking to the Shuunamite woman. Now, if you are not familiar with the Song of Songs (Solomon), now we be a good time for me to break it on down a little (not that I'm a Bible scholar but I love this book!). There are different theories about the book of Song of Songs (Solomon) and whether or not it is the story of King Solomon and a Shuunamite woman or Christ and the Church. Some argue that it can't be both but I think it is. :) Regardless, the book is a dialog between the Shuunamite woman (aka Beloved) and Solomon (aka Lover). Shuunamite woman is who we were talking about in Chapter 1 and the verse in Chapter 2 is spoken by the Lover. Hear again what he says:

Catch for us the foxes, the little foxes that ruin the vineyards, our vineyards that are in bloom.

Remember, he is speaking to the Shuunamite woman and he tells her to catch the foxes that ruin our vineyards. Okay, so what about these foxes?

Now, he was speaking to her in regards to those things that would try and inhibit their love and telling her to "catch them". Jesus would tell us the same thing today, catch the foxes that ruin your vineyard!

What are our foxes?
I believe they are our excuses, our sins (pride, unbelief, fear, gluttony, selfishness, jealousy, unforgiveness, you name it!) and our THOUGHTS!

ANYTHING that inhibits our love relationship with the Lord is our FOX.

God commands us to CATCH those foxes. What does that look like? It looks like, "taking captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. (2 Corinthians 10:5)" That is how we catch the foxes! God continues to impress upon me the importance of our thoughts! We have the ability to choose what we think on and what we allow in our life!

Now, I'm gonna be real honest and tell you that Joyce Meyer used to annoy the snot out of me! Every time I turned on the TV to watch Enjoying Everyday Life or if I tuned in on the radio, she was ALWAYS talking about our thoughts. And I would get so annoyed and would think to myself, "does she ever talk about anything else?!" But as I continue this journey of freedom and wholeness, I realize, there really isn't anything else to talk about and Joyce was right all along!

Now, here is the connection, I see, between these two verses.

The way that we avoid neglecting our own vineyards is to catch the little foxes that spoil the vine!!

So, here's our plan of action: pray and ask the Lord, "what are my 'foxes'"? Then, set traps and take those "foxes" captive! You and I have more authority than we recognize and walk in! It is my prayer that we would walk in more authority than we ever have before and that we really would take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ.The ultimate goal of all of this is our vineyards blossoming as we are in a love relationship with the Lord!

Portion Control

I am doing a Bible Study/Book Study with some friends of mine called, "Made to Crave". I am unable to read the book part for times sake, at this juncture of my life, but I am actively in pursuit of craving God more than I crave food or anything else.

Just last night, as we talked, I shared with the ladies my unwillingness to be bound by calorie counting and salad consumption 24/7, because for me, that is bondage. Instead of taking my focus off of food, it makes me even more concerned with it and that is problematic for me. So, I shared with them that I am learning to control my "portions" of the foods I like. A cookie is ok. Twelve is not.

This morning, I came across a scripture in Lamentations 3 verse 24:
The Lord is my PORTION, says my soul, therefore, I have hope in Him.

WOW!!! Let's break that down.

The Lord is my PORTION-

One of the issues the author of Made to Crave brings up is that we are often overweight physically but underweight spiritually. Man, is that ever true! The reality is that the Lord is the only One that will truly satisfy us! He is more than enough for me! And when I am consumed with Him and His presence, than everything else becomes of less importance (food, bills, finances, work, etc). What we fixate on is what we desire, so our fixation MUST be on Christ. Hebrews 12:2 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. 

Says my soul-

Our soul is made up of our minds, our wills and our emotions. While each of these parts is important, I would submit  to you, that the mind controls the rest, which is why we are told in Romans 12:2 to "be transformed by the renewing of your mind." The things I think on matter. If I think about a donut, chances are great I am going to go get a donut. If I think on the Lord, then chances are food or anything else is not priority but He is!

Therefore, I have hope in Him.-

When my mind is renewed and my eyes are fixed on Jesus, there I find my hope! It's not about food or about things, it's about Jesus.

Now, I know that the reality is that most of us don't think about Jesus 24/7 or even as much as we would like to. But the cool thing is that when it comes to portion control, Jesus is the answer! When He is a significant PORTION of my day and when I have filled up on Him, then I am not hungry for the things of this world. Yes, I eat food but food doesn't eat me!

Lord, help us to recognize that you truly are all we need! You are our portion and our only hope is found in you! Help us to keep our eyes fixed on You and help us to renew our minds each and every moment. And Lord, you are the best portion ever!

Psalm 34:8 TASTE and see that the Lord is good!

A Noah Kind of Different

This morning I was strolling through Genesis as SLOWLY as I know how (see last blog if you are confused) when I came to Genesis 6. Genesis 6 is the account of Noah and the flood of 8 million trillion BC (totally arbitrary number)!

Now while I have nicknamed my Wednesday night professor "Noah" because he literally looks like he walked off the ark with the long hair and beard, along with the fact that we sit two by two in class, that is not why God highlighted this story to me today. :)

Genesis 6 starts out with God saying that the thoughts of the heart of man were only evil all the time (vs. 5). He goes on to say that He regrets even making man because they have caused his heart pain (vs.6).

While I tried to figure out what events had taken place to make God regret making man, as scripture doesn't say much about what has transpired, I see now that it was the heart issue that God was upset about. With the sin choice of Adam and Eve, our hearts became evil, more specifically, the thoughts of the heart. Proverbs 23:7 backs this issue up, "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he." (NKJV) Man thought evil in his heart and he became evil. Just like us.

Since God is holy and unable to be in the presence of evil, he decides to wipe mankind from the earth and he begins to get things in motion to do that (vs.7). But then we come upon verse 8.

Genesis 6:8 says, "But Noah found favor in the eyes of the Lord." (NIV) The Message bible says it this way, "But Noah was different. God liked what he saw in Noah."

Ok, hold up! If the thoughts of the heart of men were evil, what made Noah able to find favor in the eyes of the Lord? What made Noah different? What made God like Noah??

We find our answer in verse 9, "Noah was a righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked with God." Righteous. Blameless. Walked with God.

Now, I can't fully wrap my head around how Noah was able to find favor with God apart from Jesus because Jesus is the only way I know. But here is the revelation I came to this morning.

1. Jesus made me righteous.
Romans 5: 19 "For as by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so also by one Man’s obedience many will be made righteous."

2. Jesus will keep me blameless.
1 Corinthians 1:8 "He will also keep you firm to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ."

3. I walk with God! :)

I am a Noah kind of different! I have found favor with the Lord! And God likes what He sees in me! That is a HUGE revelation, that God likes what He sees in me...in Christ of course!

Lord, I am so grateful for who you have made me in you! I am blessed to know that I have found favor in your sight and that I am made righteous and blameless because of Jesus! I am privilieged to be able to walk with you! I am proud to be a Noah kind of different!